Welcome welcome. It has indeed been a while. Glad to be back. Glad to have you all back. If you are an avid reader of The Daily Monoblogue, you would know that in the recent past I was a guest blogger on The Voj Files. If you aren't an avid reader of The Daily Monoblogue, you should know that in the recent past I was a guest blogger on The Voj Files.
Today's post is going to be a pivotal point in the history of The Daily Monoblogue. As I no longer have symptoms of mono, there seems to be little if any need for The Daily Monoblogue, and thus shall be dismantled. HOWEVER, as I enjoy writing (and I would hope people enjoy reading), I have decided to switch gears a little bit and focus my blogtention (blog attention) on other mildly pertinent issues. I made this decision after starting numerous (three) blog posts in the past several days which did not go anywhere. I came to a mental stumble block--and I finally decided to make this blog a medium in which I will post the things that come to mind and put commentary on the life around me. It is kind of like Seinfeld meets The Daily Show.
Kicking off this change in the wind, I would like to firmly introduce Voj. She has written a guest post entirely for this event, which is the second half in the reciprocity of our blog posts as I was a guest blogger on her blog about a week ago. You can check out her blog at alexvoj.blogspot.com. Being a year my elder, and possibly a year my wiser (although I will never attest to that), the floor will turned over to Voj and her wisdom. Enjoy!
Where did Kit Kat bites go and why? That has been a question puzzling me for quite some time. You may think it’s meaningless and wonder why Joel invited me to be his guest blogger when this is a question I consider important. You may find yourself wondering, “he couldn’t find someone more profound?” Well, I have two things to say to that my friends (and by my friends, I mean Joel’s friends). One- likes attract. So, why would you expect Joel to be friends with anyone profound? Two- this IS, in fact, an issue of importance.
Think about it. You and some friends, family members, boyfriend/girlfriend, strangers you paid, whoever, decide to go to a movie. You can’t wait to see the movie- to see how the plot plays out, to surreptitiously hold the hand of the person you have a crush on when something “scary” happens, to laugh because you’re going to see a comedy, or in Joel’s case, to drool over the hot actors on the screen (there’s a rumor going around that George Clooney is the reason he saw “Up.”)
You sit in the comfy padded seat, with the gum underneath it and the obnoxiously tall people in front of you. You suddenly realize, you need a snack. And not just any snack. The snack you get every time you go to the theatre. The snack that makes your mouth water. The snack that will redeem any boring or terrible movie.
Phew, you think, that was a close one. You walk quickly because you can’t wait until the moment you hands close around that red bag. All of a sudden, you come to a screeching halt. The candy is not there. The chocolatey goodness is gone. You pretend to the employee behind the counter that your tears are a result of the movie, not that your favorite thing about movies just disappeared, without so much as a goodbye.
What then? You look at the dough bites and know the cookie dough inside them will be stale. You glance at the m&ms and realize that the fact that you can get them anywhere makes them too ordinary to buy. You see Reeses bites out of the corner or your eye and start tearing again because what has the world come to? They kept Reeses Bites and not kit Kat Bites?
You see guys, this is not an issue of insignificance. Your whole entire movie world has been turned upside down, making the thought of going to another movie unstomachable. And that is why I urge you, if you don’t already know what your favorite candy is, to find it. And then to buy 100 bags of it.
Thanks Voj. I have yet to understand from where her inspiration for this post has come.
And now, your moment of zazen.
Being a Starbucks lover and an active Starbucks Gold Card holder, I would like to bring something to the readers' attentions. One of Starbucks' biggest competitors is surprisingly McDonalds, who have used their enormous corporate multi-national power to capitalized on the coffee market and reduce Starbucks' market share. In order to stay in the competitive game, Starbucks has decided to introduce a new sized cup--bigger than the Short (which is kids), the Tall (which ironically is a small), the Grandé (which is mediumé), and the Venti (which is large-i). Allow me to introduce, the Trenta, or as I like to say, TRENTA. The 31 ounce mammoth of a cup is a full 11 ounces grande-er than Starbucks' current largest size. It's like a swimming pool exclusively for cold drinks. The company which created coffee shop culture back in the 1980s has designed a limited market test in Phoenix and Tampa where the TRENTA will be front and center.
I would like to say thank you to McDs and modern American culture for making this possible. A person should never, and I mean never, need/want/have to consume 31 ounces of anything in one cup. You know why Europeans are thin? It's because they don't have 31 ounce drinks there. Can you guess why Americans are obese? There should NOT be demand for 31 ounce drinks here. Have you ever heard of a refill?
