Innovation in Daily Life-ation

Man and society evolve and progress together. Technology helps this loving relationship. Obvious? Yes. Stupid? No. Why would I point this out? Wait and find out.

Speech is another medium that which has also evolved and progressed. Example:

1) Slang

That's the only example I am going to give. Slang evolves with the generation. When my parents were little, Styx was "hip". What the fuck is that? Now, Styx sucks. I'm not a fan. Sorry mom (I think you occasionally read my blog..) Slang is also highly cultural--slang in America is very different than slang in Israel. זה נכון אח שלי. (Literally meaning, that's correct my brother.) Nowadays, slang seems to have taken a ghetto/retro* spin. (*Note: Retro meaning late 80s/early 90s.) Stay fresh.

My main point: I would like to point out a rhetorical device used frequently by myself and millions of Americans every day (not necessarily slang) known as (drum role please) sarcasm. Sarcasm in speech is mainly observed and understood by the use of tone. Some people have trouble using tone to indicate the use of sarcasm which in turn seems like they are being serious. Example: "Ugh. I got like an hour of sleep last night." Those people are bitches.

The picture below shows the sarcigins (sarcasm origins).


Thank you Wikipedia. You just saved the day again.

Now the statement above (i.e. "Thank you Wikipedia. You just saved the day again.") was sarcasm. But how would anyone know that? Well, it is my pleasure to introduce the SarcMark.


The SarcMark (short for Sarcasm Mark) is a new American punctuation mark (there is such a thing in certain Ethiopian languages) from Sarcasm Inc. used at the end sentences to denote a sarcastic tone within said sentence. For $1.99, you can physically show sarcasm in your writing (but only on PC's and Blackberries--the Apple software hasn't been perfected yet). I can't believe I got an Apple and not a PC (insert SarcMark here)

Shoutout to my wasp-wannabe brother, David. He's getting the plane, I'm getting the yacht.

Your moment of zazen.

Wallpaper

Within the past year or so, a good friend of mine introduced to a website that changed my life. Some may call it a waste of time, others (including myself) would call it an awakening that has introduced me to what the virtual (and physical) world has to offer. Yes, I am speaking about StumbleUpon(.com).

To put it simply, StumbleUpon shows the "stumbler" all the internet's cool shit--and there is much cool shit which is on said internet.



The New York Times likes it too:



Anyway, on Friday I was stumbling, and found a website with all these different wallpapers. Not the decorative paper you put on your walls to make a room less bland, but rather that which occupies one's desktop on their computer (the background). Friday, I was coming off being sick (I was told to blog about that, but I'd rather not) along with the rest of my family who are 82.9 miles away, and I found a website with wallpapers. I sat in my bed, completely expressionless, for five hours straight, finding wallpapers and copying them into a folder on my desktop. They are mostly sweet photos (cities at night, nature scenes, artsy black and white shit, etc), or adobe influenced/made abstract art. I spent another three hours looking last night whilst video chatting with a friend. I found a bunch of backgrounds. This is my favorite:




Your moment of zazen.

Joel: Sounds good. I could go for some kitch.
Aaron: Super delish.
Joel: Maybe I'll get some jim.
Aaron: That's a socially acceptable alternative to kitch.

"I once saw a forklift lift a crate of forks. It was way too literal for me." --Mitch Hedberg

Nothing Exciting

My weekend:

Thursday.

Thursday night my dad decided to pay a visit to his alma mater to see his eldest child. After meeting him at the terrace after class, I proceeded to buy him popcorn. We then hung out at the terrace for a bit, walked around Memorial Union, checked out the newly renovated Historical Society, went to the bookstore, walked up State Street, walked to the house, and finally drove to the Edgewater for dinner--all of which were my father's ideas. I am convinced he has adult ADD. Although a little pricey, we finally made it to the Edgewater and had a delicious dinner. At one point during the meal, the waiter (who was dressed in a tuxedo) was refilling my dad's water glass and spilled a little on my dad's arm. The waiter sincerely apologized and then ran back to get our food. He tripped on a chair and almost ate shit. Schadenfreude (for those who haven't seen Avenue Q, Schadenfreude is the act of taking happiness in other's misfortune.) Pretty funny.

Friday.
Went out to lunch with Momma Voj, Normal Voj, Benny and Alyssa. Had a lot of fun. I am usually great with parents; however, I was not off to a good start with Momma Voj. But she likes me and doesn't think I'm an asshole...which is good. Later a bunch of us went to Hillel for dinner as usual. Went back to the house. A bunch of people were going to Brickhouse BBQ so I tagged along. Noah stumbled in holding a box of pizza saying how he got kicked out of a rodeo. You know...whatever. Ask Benny, Solarz, Kippi, Curren or myself for more details.

Saturday.
Greek Week started. Eric, Teddy, Goldfinger and Seaston all participated in the Walk A Mile In Her Shoes race. Apparently Sam was a baller and just took off down the street. Thanks for participating guys. Later on was formal. My very motherly friend, Sydnie, came in from Lake Forest College as my date. We ended up having a lot of fun. Jenny (Freems' ex?) ate all my food off my plate at formal.

Sunday.
Went to the library with Alyssa and found Voj. Sat in the computer lab for 30 minutes or so photoshopping her into a picture from formal.

Before


After


All in all, pretty fun weekend. After last weekend (which was insane!) it was nice to have a semi chill weekend.



Also, this Thursday (April 22) ZBT at UWisconsin is having its annual philanthropy event. "Sausage Fest" is at State Street Brats from 5:00-8:00 pm and proceeds will go to the Lance Armstrong Foundation. Tickets are $10 in advance and $15 at the door, and you can redeem your ticket for either 1 sausage or 2 hot dogs, unlimited soda and fries, and dessert. T-Shirts are $10. It's gonna be a lot of fun and I hope to see all you there! Check out our Facebook Event, "ZBT's Sausage Fest" for more info on ticket sellers in your area.

Quick shoutouts:
Jeremy- happy birthday bud.
Benny- BENNNAYYYYYY!
Larzy- You are the man.

Your moment of zazen.

Arrested Development

Firstly, I would like to apologize seeing that i haven't posted in a while. This post will talk about arrested development.

It should be noted that this notion of "arrested development" is somewhat paradoxical, as there can be no progress when being held back. This happens to be a central theme of one of my favorite TV shows appropriately and properly named, Arrested Development.



In somewhat related news, I took an micro economics exam this morning mainly dealing with MRS (marginal and markets in perfect competition.) I think the exam went pretty well; however, there was one question that caught my eye and stuck with me throughout the duration of the exam. The question: A man named Gob has a magic show. He has X (I forgot the amount) dollars to spend. He can hire an assistant for $8 or buy a new deck of cards for $2. His MU (marginal utility--i.e. his enjoyment/need) for hiring a new assistant is 4 "utils" and his MU for buying a new deck of cards is 2 "utils." How many assistants should he hire and/or decks of cards should he buy?

I would like preface the rest of the post by saying Gob, or GOB, is the main character's (Michael) older brother in the TV show, Arrested Development. Being a huge fan of said program, I noticed a few problems with this microeconomics exam question:

1) GOB (which is an acronym standing for George Oscar Bluth, a nickname and not an actual name itself as the question implies) has used many family members/significant others as assistants: his little brothers Michael and Buster, his nephew George Michael, as well as his Mexican girlfriend, Marta (with whom Michael is in love). So he wouldn't hire an assistant.

2) GOB is a magician but does not have a magic show considering he was blackballed from the Magician's Alliance--an organization which GOB started in order to prevent magicians from telling how they do illusions, not tricks. "A trick is something a whore does for money...or cocaine." GOB was blackballed from the Alliance after he tried to hide his father, George, in "The Aztec II" when the Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) was chasing a rented boat that George was having his retirement party on (Yes, the SEC has boats), and the news showed how GOB hid his father. Once blackballed from the Alliance, GOB is not able to perform, so he doesn't have a magic show (besides for the show he put on for the Alliance members so he could get back into his organization. It didn't work out.)

3) This is not necessarily a problem, but GOB would have a very high MU for doves, lighter fluid, and pennies. If you don't understand the reference, please watch the show immediately. I have all three seasons on DVD and am willing to loan them out.

Arrested Development is one of the best shows every written. Every time I watch an episode, I always discover some new hidden joke or reference. In the words of Shrek, "[Arrested Development]...is like an onion--it has layers."

By the way, the answer is that he should spend all of his money on cards because "Gob" gets the same amount of utility for half the price.


Your moment of zazen.

Springy Breakelstein

Yes, the title of this blog post was my status. Yes, it is a pull at Harley Bartelstein. Springy breakelstein has indeed come to a close and I returned back to Madison. Since returning I have had the mildly awkward conversation of "How was your spring(y) break(elstein)?" many a time. Spring break this year was alright. Here's what happened:

Thursday: Ended class. Stayed in Madison one last night to chill with friends before returning to normalcy.

Friday: Woke up to a call from Glock. Packed up my room. Got some Ian's Pizza (delicious chametz) with Aaron and Nathan. Home. Haircut. Shabbat dinner.

Saturday: Chilled. Donna came over. Awesome. Went to Potowatami Bingo Casino and played bingo with Aaron and Becca. Fun shit. Becca got so pissed she was about to pop a bitch in the face. Good thing I was there to stop her...

Sunday: Lunch with Alyssa. Panera. I got a soup and salad. Wish they opened a Panera close by campus.

Monday: Stayed in bed. Had the first seder at the house. Had a lot of wine in hopes it would speed up the seder. Almost passed out at the table after dinner. I thought of Voj.

Tuesday: Seder two. Just the family. Didn't have any wine due to extreme alcohol intake on the previous night. Seder went too slow. I learned I am bad at striking a balance.

Wednesday: Slept all day. Attempted to do some Psych reading. Didn't turn out too well.

Thursday: Ran a bunch of errands. Flew to Pittsburgh to see the grandma and the great grandfather.

Friday: Pittsburgh. Had a revelation. I'm buying a yacht. Either the Phocea http://www.fraseryachts.com/Sale/sale_gallery.aspx?YachtID=Y3548_MC, or the Aerie http://www.fraseryachts.com/Sale/sale_gallery.aspx?YachtID=Y6781_SD. It was also my great grandmother's 103rd birthday. When asked how she felt to be 103 she responded, "I'm ancient! It's sickening...!"

Saturday: More Pittsburgh. Sat around the table all day eating and chilling with family.

Sunday: Home. Packing. Back to Madison.


Your moment of zazen.

"You must remember, salt and pepper stick together."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dTCm8tdHkfI